Have you ever lit up a cigar then, half way through, regretted your decision? I’m not talking about a cigar that tastes bad. In this case we are talking about a tried and true stick that always seems to deliver what is expected of it.
This morning I woke up earlier than usual. After a few minutes of staring at the time on my alarm clock, I got out of bed and decided to get a jump on the day. By the time I got myself ready for work it was still a bit early. Why not make the most of it – I’ll run down to the local convenience store, pick up a breakfast sandwich and a coffee, and smoke a cigar on the drive in to work.
After coming out of the store I hopped in my car, cranked up the radio, fired up a Guerrilla Warfare (the only short cigar I had on hand), and made my way into the office. If you haven’t had the Guerilla Warfare, it is a bit of a power bomb but a great smoke nonetheless. Anyway, I thought I’d be funny and post a picture to Cigar Noise to the effect that this cigar would “straighten out the short & curlies at 4:00am”. All in all, the morning was shaping up to be a good one.
About fifteen minutes into my commute and I still hadn’t touched my coffee. It was too hot to drink initially and I had forgotten about it. The breakfast sandwich went untouched as well – I planned to eat it at my desk before starting my day. I was caught in absolute surprise when it happened…
I’m struck by a wave of uncertainty. In an instant I’m hot and I can feel the sweat forcing its way through the skin on my forehead. There is a shift in my mid section and I don’t know if the trouble is going to be north or south. What could I do on a back country road? I turned down the radio and began giving myself the pep talk.
‘Don’t be a wuss, you’ve smoked these cigars this early before without turning green…’
I grabbed the cup of coffee and debated taking a sip. It would either help settle things or it would prime the pump. I was a long way from a safe place and didn’t know what else to do. The last thing I wanted was to pull over to throw up or, heaven forbid, be the guy squatting in a cut corn field as random passing headlights shined on my ass.
The coffee wound up doing the trick. After a tense couple of minutes I was back to puffing on my Guerrilla Warfare while cruising on down the road. The lesson to be learned here is that regardless of your tolerance for powerful cigars, sometimes you may push things a little too far.
The last time this happened to me was the night my daughter was born. When mom and baby were sleeping soundly I slipped away for an Opus X on an empty stomach. I should have learned my lesson 5 years ago.